They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
