What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
