i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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