i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
kristin has been a bad kristin
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
