I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Randomize
