is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize