does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She bit a glass in half.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
