Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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