this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I pour the whiskey from now on
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
