Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
