im six kinds of drunk right now
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize