I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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