I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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