Where is the hickey?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
