yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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