Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize