if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize