It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize