Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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