people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
