Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
