Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
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