Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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