You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize