I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
