she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
