Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
she looked like the before picture.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
