i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
COCAINE IS GR8
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
