this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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