a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
