Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
