youre lurking in front of me
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize
