Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
