i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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