I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
