anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
