You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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