Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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