No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
