i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
