the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize