Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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