Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
