Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
