it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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