oh god the rape fog is back!
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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