Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
