Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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