He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
