he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
