I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
