i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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